tanga!

i was not able to share this.. it was last october 26 when this thing happened.. pinagmukha lang naman akong tanga kakahintay sa isang bagay na di darating.. kalokohan noh? imagine, naghintay ako nga halos tatlong oras?

well, this is what happened. I slept at around 7 pm that wednesday night. i was way too tired from the enrollment process.. and the over one hour trip from Iligan. i was sleeping when my 2 sisters woke me up because someone called-- a number not registered on my phonebook. i answered the phone and my bestfriend was the one who's on the other line. he was asking if i could go online. because we don't have innternect connection at home, i told him i could not and that my smart broadband is out of load. he asked for the smartbro number and i gave it to him.

so, eto naman si tanga, naghintay. naghintay ng almost 3 hours sa wala.. could've just sleep after almost an hour of waiting but stupid me, i didn't. and that's what hurts me.. STUPID. STUPID. STUPID me :((

tired..

tired for these past few days.. mentally tired.. there are lots and lots of things that's on my mind right now.. and i don't even know how to get rid of them.. Not that i am a negative thinker.. like duh!!

it's so exhausting.. really.. helping someone with his/her problems but not being able to solve mine.. Neuro 2 exam will be next week, November 4 and I haven't studied a thing.. what'll happen to me?? yikes.. i wish i still have another week so that i could study.. worse, i don't even feel like studying even if i have a month.. waaah.. i just wanna cry out loud.. i wanna scream.. i wanna curse. i wanna kill time. hayst..

yesterday was our enrolment anyway.. and took me a day before i was able to finish all the process. I was effin tired that i wanna go to CDO to unwind.. but too bad, i was not able to do it.. i badly wanna buy an external memory because my Cubee is not functioning well.. i don't have a netbook/laptop anymore.. shoot! back to what happened yesterday. i was undecided.. i wanna go to CDO but i have no one to accompany me.. then, past 4 pm, when my sister texted me, asking me where i was.. asking me to go home early because dadootz gonna get mad if i'd be going home late.. so, past 4 pm, almost 5 (quarter to five i think) when i left Tubod. Traffic..

at TERMINAL.. yikes.. i hate the scene.. it was somewhat suffocating.. it made me a bit nauseous.. people here and there with this super EXTRA BIG LUGGAGE that you could hardly pass from the jeepney's entrance to its seats.. and there was this man who kept on smoking (i thought smoking in public is prohibited? bet, that man don't know this or just way to ignorant, he didn't understand that simple law).. arrgggh.. it was around 5 pm when we left Iligan City and i arrived safely at home around 630 pm.. (yeah, i was scolded a bit but what can i do?? i just can't make the jeep run faster, right?)..

then, sleep at around 730.. was not able to watch any shows.. too bad..

and here i am, still, blabbering about getting sooo tired despite my more-than-10-hours-sleep last night.. how about that? arrrgggh.. i hate me.. i hate life.

GIRLS. GIRLS. GIRLS.

I just copied this. and i felt like posting it here :))

ANG MGA BABAE [ http://bit.ly/nnCp0s ]

1. Moody: Inborn na sa mga babae to. Kung badtrip kami, wag niyo nang sasabayan.

2. Pag sinabi naming nagtatampo kami, lambing lang katapat: Yung salitang tampo way lang namin yun para sabihing lambingin niyo kami. Konting I love you niyo lang, okay na kami.

3. Gusto namin yung palagi kaming kino-compliment: Pag may bago sa itsura namin, gusto naming mapansin niyo. Kasi nakakataas ng self-confidence namin yun.

4. Pag napansin niyong naging sersyoso yung mga text namin, may mali: Kapag ganun, may nagawa kayong di namin nagustuhan. Kaya be alert. Kapag sinabe naming wala, meron talaga. Nahihiya lang kami. Kaya pilitin niyo kaming sabihin sa inyo. At pagtapos naming masabi, konting lambing lang. Back to normal na ulit.

5. Selosa kami: Kaya iwasan niyong makipag harutan sa ibang girls. Lalo na sa harapan namin. Pero may ibang babae na tahimik lang kung mag-selos. Inoobserabahan lang kayo. Pero kapag napuno, simula na ng away.

6. Kaming mga babae, normal lang ang ma-attract sa mga gwapo: Hanggang tingin lang kami. Kasi hindi naman na namin makikita ulit. Ma-attract man kami sa 1M lalaki, ang puso namin ay para lang sa tunay naming mahal. Ganun din naman kayong mga lalaki. Kapag nakakita ng maganda at sexy. Magaling lang kayong magtago.

7. Kaming mga babae, pinagmamalaki namin yung mga mahal namin ng hindi nila nalalaman: Katulad nalang sa mga GM (Group Message), Facebook at TUMBLR.

8. Ayaw namin sa mga manliligaw na nagmamadali: Yung tipo ng mga lalaking laging nagtatanong kung kailan ba namin sila sasagutin. Naiirita kami. Kaya dapat maging matiyaga kayo kasi dun namin nalalaman kung sino talaga kayo.

9. Kapag malungkot o tahimik kami, gusto namin ng yakap galing sa inyo: Kasi iba yung pakiramdam kapag hawak niyo na kami. Gumagaan yung pakiramdam namin. :">

10. Gustong gusto namin yung mga lalaking malaki ang respeto samin: Yung tipong pag ayaw namin magpa-kiss, hindi niyo gagawin. Instead, lalambingin ka na lang sa ibang paraan. Ang pinaka gusto naming kiss, kiss on the forehead. It symbolizes, respect.

11. Ang nagpapa-turn on samin ay yung lalaking protective: Yung kapag kasama namin kayo, feeling namin safe na safe kami. Walang mangyayaring masama at hindi kami ilalagay sa panganib.

12. Ayaw namin sa lalaking hanggang text lang: Kung mahal niyo talaga kami, patunayan niyo sa personal. Wag yung sa text lang kayo magaling. Magpaka-lalaki kayo!

13. Sobra kaming natutuwa sa mga lalaking ma-effort: Yung kahit walang special day, feel mo eh special ang araw araw niyo. Kasi sobrang nakakatuwa kapag ang lalaki laging nagpuput in ng effort. Feeling naming babae eh, isa kaming prinsesa.

14. Ang pangarap naming mga babae yung ipapakilala kami ng mga lalaki sa kanilang mga barkada at lalo na sakanilang pamilya: Feeling namin kami na yung pinaka maswerteng babae sa mundo. Kasi iilan lang ang lalaking naglalakas loob ipakilala kami sa parents at barkada nila. Yung iba kasi nahihiya. At feeling din nmin angkin na angkin na namin ang isang lalaki dahil nakilala na namin ang mga taong bumubuo sa buhay niya. :)

15. Magaling kaming mag-pretend: Kapag nasasaktan kami, nagpapaka-manhind kami. Kapag may nakitang di maganda, nagbubulagbulagan kami. Kapag may narinig na mali, nagbibingibingihan kami. Pero kapag mag-isa nalang kami, dun kami naglalabas ng sakit. Dun kami umiiyak. Kaya ang pangarap naming lalaki is yung sensitive enough sa mga nararamdaman namin. Yung kayang magtanong hanggang sa umamin kami.

DOOR TWO

I'm here at Papa Jarred's crib. Not really sure if i'm gonna stay here overnight (to study) or what. I surely won't be able to study at boarding house if I'm gonna go home. Well, anyways, the MUMU is here (si Bakz). Hehehehe.. And I don't know why. He should actually be at the hospital right now. Papa Jarred, Mama Shengot, Jinu Bibi, Ate Joh, Manghud Jeun Pyo (tikboy) are also here. But this is not a reunion.

I am done drawing/sketching SUPERMAN. Yehey!! I am so happy cause I've been wanting to draw Superman. Got addicted to him fewzeks back. I was also able to finish the Skull-Angel Tattoo i copied from the net. It was sooooo fun. But I am not yet good in using charcoal pencils. I still have to practice and practice. I'm gonna post my artworks here once i have my cam. I badly wanna post it now, too bad, my microSD reader won't function. So, though i took lots of photos using my phone, i still can't post them.. Also, my second sketch-- Taylor Lautner. I just used ordinary pencils anyway. And I drew this one last semester-- out of boredom.. Good thing, it turned out well..

They're eating AYPLEM (icecream).. yay! I wanna have a cupful but Papa Jarred's teasing me. I am not POLYPHAGIC! Tease and tease and tease, go on, i still am going to eat.. LOTSA food. Goodbye DIET! Hello FOOD! hahaha..

so, til here.. Zoom zoom! -_____-

accepting my defeat

It was your choice

and i could do nothing at all

You left me with nothing.

as much as i want to talk to you

like before

when our laughter joins in harmony

we can't

it's impossible.

as much as how i want to tease you

and be near you

just like before

it cannot be.

we just can't.

don't wonder.

don't ASK.

before, i asked why can't we?

it was a question i've been wanting to ask

For so many times, it happened

I knew the answer-- but kept on denying it.

just recently, something inside of me

made me realize

that i'm right.

what i was thinking all along was right.

you CHOSE her.

that's it.

it's not that you don't want to talk to me

nor is it that we're not close anymore.

YOU CHOSE her.

it was your choice.

and you felt threatened-- your relationship.

threatened by the history that we have

the extraordinary friendship, isn't it?

ACCEPTANCE

that's what i've been wanting to do.

cause that's all that i could do.

it is something i on't wanna live with--

but i have to live with.

i could hardly fathom things.

but that's just how life it.

UNFAIR.

always UNFAIR.

you give so much--

but you get nothing in return.

You do good things--

but people forget it.

You make one mistake--

and everyone sees it.

Life-- that's life..

but God is not unfair.

He never is.

that's why, after all the struggles

the heartbreak and the defeat

and after accepting them all

Life gives you something more

something more that what you expect from it.

More than what YOU REALLY ASKED FOR.

Better.

Best.

i'm letting go.

my heart has been broken so many times.

crushed so many times.

i'm letting go.

and i forgive you.

but i will never forget a single thing.

all those things we had.

i'd be moving on-- forward.

on and on.

i will forever miss you.

Domo Arigato gozaimsu. ;)

ACCIDENTALLY inLOVE

yes I AM.. and to Superman.. hehehehe.. feels ecstatic. yay! i can't describe the feelings. Happy. happy. Happy. yun! and, it felt a bit strange..

I LOVE YOU Superman. :)

Second Birthday

It's my baby's second birthday today.. Oh, how i missed him.. just too bad that he wasn't here. well, anyways, according to my sister, they celebrated his birthday. They went to the beach. and right now, i'm wondering if he has enjoyed the day (he hates water. HAHAHAHAH).. well, i hope he did..

well, dearest, Happy happy happy birthday to you.. My little boy is growing up.. Your Tita Dede loves you sooo much.. this one is for you :)

I love you and I miss you so much, zamzam.. hope to see you soon..

STRANDED

after eons, i'm listening to jennifer paige's song again. Last Song Syndrome and i don't know why. HAHAHA.. yay! come, sing with me :)

You know it only breaks my heart
To see you standing in the dark
Alone waiting there for me to come back
I'm too afraid to show

If it's coming over you
Like it's coming over me
I'm crashing like a tidal wave
That drags me out to sea
I wanna be with you
If you wanna be with me
Crashing like a tidal wave
I don't want to be
Stranded
Stranded
Stranded
Stranded
Stranded
So baby come back to me [Stranded]
So baby come back to me [Stranded]

I can only take so much
These tears are turning me to rust
I know you're waiting there for me to come back
I'm too afraid to show

If it's coming over you
Like it's coming over me
I'm crashing like a tidal wave
That drags me out to sea
I wanna be with you
If you wanna be with me
Crashing like a tidal wave
I don't wanna be
(Stranded)It's coming over you
(Stranded)It's coming over me
(Stranded)It's coming over you
(Stranded)Yeah yeah yeah

I miss you
I need you
Without you
I'm stranded
I love you
So come back
I'm not afraid to show

Crashing like a tidal wave
Drags me out to sea
I wanna be with you
You wanna be with me
Crashing like a tidal wave
I don't wanna
Stranded
It's coming over you [Stranded]
It's coming over me [Stranded]
It's coming over you [Stranded]
Stranded
Stranded
Stranded

So baby come back to me [Stranded]
So baby come back to me [Stranded]

(Stranded)Coming over you
(Stranded)Coming over you
(Stranded)Coming over me
(Stranded) Coming over you

(Stranded Stranded)So baby come back to me
(Stranded Stranded)So baby come back to me

Stranded
Stranded
Stranded
Stranded

• check the MUSIC VIDEO here.. ENJOY :))

MSU Golden Anniversary

This is a very very late post.

So, MSU 50^th founding anniversary is over—so is our vacation (4 days—it’s long enough for us Med students). What happened during that day? September 01, 2011—I woke up earlier than usual, took a bath and prepared for the parade. Went to MSU at around 630 in the morning. Well, as usual, many became opportunists especially those drivers who asked for 10 pesos from the passengers (MSU prep to College of HRM—way too much for such a short distance, right?).

MSU— crowding! Many were in their uniformed printed shirts. Our college, MSU-COM, gathered in front of CHS. When I arrived there, you could see happy, excited faces. Picture, picture, pictures!! You could hear them shouting, singing—most were having fun.

Earlier that day, I wasn’t happy at all. With tummy rumbling, I could hardly fake a smile. I was hungry. After the parade, we decided to look for a place where we could eat but to my disgust, almost all food establishments in MSU were close—some reasoned out that they still need to clean, others said that they won’t open until 10 am (it was around 830 that time). I was like, ‘where are the brains of the owners/managers of these food establishments? If they opened up earlier, they’d have around 5K or more for that morning alone’. Knowing the fact that many were not able to take their breakfast cause meeting time was like 6-630 am, they should have thought of opening earlier than usual. Cause it’s not like any other ordinary day, right? I was soooo pissed that morning I lost my appetite. :D

But anyway, for the record, not all that start badly ends badly. This day proved it. I was happy at the end of the day. I was sooooooooo happy. It was an exhausting day but it’s all worth it.. anyways, here are my favorite PHOTOS:

me with Bakz (my bestfriend). this is our first picture together again after eons :))

around 7 am, the time i arrived at the meeting place (in front of CHS), he asked me to have pic with him.. :)

Before we went home. with bakz again. This is the tarpaulin in front of our dear Biology Department.

i some kinda miss our tambayan. (model-modelan na naman drama ko ;P)

me with the grasshopper that Bakz put on my jacket. That insect was a bit scary.. yikes. thanks anyway to Heidi Girl for this Photo. Smile pa din kahit takot na oh.. HAHAHA.

with my Marlon bibi (who was a bit shocked) and Heidi (all smile). this was at the jeep, on our way back to Iligan City for the Motorcade for the New Doctors :)

YOUR GIRL- a late post

So, I met your girl. And I must admit that I didn’t like her at first. Could you blame me if girls after girls you had, none of them seemed brave enough to show who they really are? Could you blame me if I first doubted her—her sincerity? Could you blame me if after all of those girls that you had, I befriended none of them because they see me not as a friend but a THREAT?

I’m sorry if I had to act that way. I don’t think if you could blame me at all. After all, I never had good memories with any of your girls in the past. See, I even call myself a CURSE to you because of them. Good thing, this new one, Ms. Jy made me feel different.

I don’t know if there’s a need to defend myself—my actions that night. But to make things clear, I wanted to do it.. That was our first meeting—vis-à-vis. We were ONLINE friends, if you could call that one. she send me messages, I reply. She would tweet me, I’d tweet back—and it’s something I wanted to call social responsibility. See, I was so shocked. Being kissed by someone you just met—it ain’t good at all, right? We’re not close, you know that. I was even hesitant of meeting her. So, right then and there, I asked for alcohol. I HATE being KISSED by someone I am not acquainted with—much more, by someone I just met. and I was also thinking that it’s the peak of the fiesta so the thought of being kissed in the cheek by someone who might had eaten something with pork disgust me.

I’m not gonna say sorry. Not now, not ever. I did nothing wrong.

DAMN NIGHT!

Damn night! I hate this feeling.. see, your girl is asking me about your past—about your Ex.. and sorry if I disappoint her but I won’t tell her a thing. There are lots and lots of reasons I could give her why I don’t want to. I don’t trust her anyway. I couldn't trust. NEVER will I do that after what she has done to me. DUH! Within 72 hours, she broke it. I’ve lost my respect towards her. Well, I think that’s what she wants cause if not, she won’t do it in the first place, right?

Anyway, back to your past, I don’t think if I’ve got the right to blabber about her. We’re not close—we’re not even friends for me to say something about her. I hate her for all the things that she did. I hate her but I don’t wanna badmouth her. And I knew not much about her. I’m not playing safe or whatever you may want to call this—but I still believe that respect begets respect.

Anyway, can you please tell your girl to stop asking me about you and your past and anything about you? I think you two should be close enough that you should not keep any secret from each other. You are in this relationship so I think, you two should be transparent to each other. Cause what’s the point of engaging in such relationship if you could not even trust one another?

Ciao for now. -_-